Court Prep Survival Guide

Is Massachusetts the right state?

Your child must have lived in MA for at least 6 consecutive months before filing (UCCJEA home state rule, M.G.L. c. 209B). If your child recently moved to MA, you may need to wait.

If you're unmarried, establish parentage first

Sign a Voluntary Acknowledgment of Parentage at the hospital or town clerk, or file a Complaint to Establish Parentage (CJD 106). Without established parentage, you have no legal rights to custody or parenting time.

Gather your documentation BEFORE filing

• Parenting journal — school pickups, doctor visits, bedtime routines, overnights
• School records — report cards, attendance, teacher emails
• Medical records — vaccinations, appointment attendance
• Communication records — texts, emails with co-parent (keep responses brief and respectful)
• Financial records — pay stubs, tax returns, child-related expense receipts
• Photos — documenting your living environment and time with your child
• Witness list — teachers, coaches, daycare providers, family members

Prepare your parenting plan

If you're seeking shared custody, you must submit a shared custody implementation plan at trial (M.G.L. c. 208, § 31). It must include education, health care, dispute resolution, and residential/visitation schedules. Use our Parenting Plan Template to prepare this.

Talk to a lawyer if possible

Even a one-hour consultation can save you thousands. Free options:

• MBA Dial-A-Lawyer — (617) 338-0610 — first Wednesday of each month
• MA Free Legal Answers — mass.freelegalanswers.org — post a question, get a pro bono answer
• MA Bar Association Lawyer Referral — (617) 654-0400 — $25 for 30-min consult

Where to file

The Probate & Family Court in the county where the child lives (for unmarried parents) or where you and your spouse lived together (for divorce). Find your court at mass.gov.

What forms to file

• Complaint for Custody, Support, Parenting Time (CJD 109) — unmarried parents with parentage established
• Complaint to Establish Parentage (CJD 106) — if parentage not yet established
• Child Care or Custody Disclosure Affidavit — required in ALL custody cases
• Military Affidavit (TC0002) — required at initial filing
• Child Support Guidelines Worksheet (CJD 304) — if child support is involved
• Affidavit of Indigency — if you can't afford filing fees

How to file

In person at the clerk's office, by mail, or online via eFileMA. The clerk issues a summons.

After filing — Service

The complaint and summons must be served on the other parent by a sheriff, constable, or authorized person ($50–$75). You cannot serve them yourself. File proof of service with the court. Keep copies of everything.

Filing fees

• Custody/Support/Parenting Time complaint: $115
• Divorce (includes custody): $215
• Complaint for Modification: $50 + $5 summons
• Service of process: ~$50–$75
• Co-parenting course ("Two Families Now"): $49

Can't afford fees? File an Affidavit of Indigency

Eligible if income ≤125% of federal poverty level OR receiving MassHealth, SNAP, TAFDC, or SSI. Covers filing fees, court costs, and service fees.

• Download fee waiver forms (Mass.gov)
• Online tool to complete it (Suffolk Lit Lab)

Additional potential costs

• Guardian ad Litem (GAL): $3,000–$20,000
• Attorney (full representation): $5,000–$50,000+ for contested cases
• Limited Assistance Representation (LAR): $200–$500/hour for specific tasks
• Mediation: $200–$500/hour (sliding scale available)

MA Probate & Family Court doesn't have a published formal dress code, but court notices print "proper dress required" in bold. Judges notice how you present yourself.

Wear:

• Suit or sport coat with tie, collared shirt tucked in, slacks with a belt
• Clean, pressed, neutral colors — navy or charcoal suit with white shirt passes any judge's standard
• Dress shoes with socks

Don't wear:

• T-shirts, shorts, tank tops, flip-flops, sneakers, hats/caps
• Ripped jeans, baggy pants below hips, clothing exposing midriff or underwear
• Clothing with slogans/graphics, athletic wear, jerseys, sweatpants

Grooming:

• Clean shaven or neatly trimmed. Hair neat.
• Cover tattoos if possible. Remove facial piercings.
• Minimal jewelry. No heavy cologne.

If coming from work and can't change, tell your attorney so they can inform the judge.

• Always stand when addressing the judge, and when the judge enters or leaves the courtroom
• Address the judge as "Your Honor" — not "Judge," not "Sir/Ma'am"
• Never interrupt the judge. Wait until they finish speaking before you respond.
• Don't argue with the judge. If you disagree with a ruling, your attorney handles it. If self-represented, state your position calmly and accept the ruling.
• Speak clearly and concisely. Answer only the question asked. Don't volunteer information. Don't ramble.
• Say "Yes, Your Honor" / "No, Your Honor" — not "yeah" or "uh-huh"
• Never use profanity — even when describing what the other parent did. Say "the other parent used inappropriate language" instead of repeating the words.
• Refer to the other parent as "the other parent" or "the plaintiff/defendant" — not "my ex" or "she/he"

Bring:

• Financial Statement — CJD 301S (income < $75K) or CJD 301L (income > $75K). Required for any financial matter.
• Rule 410 mandatory self-disclosure — pay stubs (last 3–4), tax returns (last 3 years), W-2s/1099s, bank statements, retirement account statements
• Multiple copies of all filed documents — 3 copies (you, judge, other parent)
• Parenting journal, overnight log, proof of parenting time
• Child-related documents — school records, medical records, childcare receipts
• Evidence organized in a binder, labeled by date — 3 copies
• Affidavit Disclosing Care or Custody Proceedings — required in all cases involving children
• Photo ID, notebook and pen
• Witness list with contact info (witnesses wait outside until called)

Do NOT bring:

• No food or drinks (water may be permitted — check locally)
• No weapons of any kind, including pocket knives and nail clippers
• No recording devices without court permission
• Don't bring your children unless the judge specifically ordered it — arrange childcare
• No large bags (slow down security screening)

• Arrive early — at least 30 minutes before your scheduled time. Security takes time. Being late signals disrespect.
• Stand when the judge enters or leaves — the clerk announces "All rise." Stand. Sit when invited.
• Sit quietly when not addressing the court. No whispering, sighing, eye-rolling, or gesturing.
• No facial reactions when the other parent or their attorney is speaking — even if they're lying. The judge watches you the entire time.
• Don't speak directly to the other parent in the courtroom. Communicate through your attorney or in writing outside court.
• Be respectful to court staff — clerks, officers, and assistants talk to the judge. Treat them with respect.
• Control your emotions. Crying quietly is human. Yelling, crying loudly, or storming out is fatal to your case.

Typical flow:

1. Check in — Sign in with the clerk. Wait for your case to be called. This can take hours — be patient.
2. Call of the list — The judge calls all cases scheduled for that session. When your name is called, stand and identify yourself. If self-represented, say "Ready, Your Honor. I'm appearing pro se."
3. Discussion/motions — The judge may ask what the case is about, whether there are preliminary motions, and whether the parties can agree on anything.
4. Temporary orders hearing (if requested) — Both sides present evidence and testimony. Judge issues temporary orders for custody, parenting time, and support.
5. Testimony — You'll be sworn in. Answer questions truthfully. If you have an attorney, they question you first (direct), then the other side cross-examines. If self-represented, you speak directly to the judge.
6. Evidence — Documents, photos, records are submitted. Each item must be "marked" as an exhibit. The judge decides what's admissible.
7. Judge's ruling — The judge may rule from the bench immediately, or "take it under advisement" and issue a written order later (days to weeks).

Timeline

• Uncontested: 90–120 days from filing to judgment
• Contested: 12–18+ months from filing to trial
• Temporary orders hearing: Usually within 30–60 days of filing the motion

1. Showing up unprepared — no documentation, no evidence, no organized plan. The court decides based on facts and documentation, not feelings of fairness.
2. Losing your temper — yelling, arguing, or showing visible anger. The judge watches your demeanor the entire time.
3. Talking when you shouldn't — interrupting the judge, speaking out of turn, arguing with opposing counsel.
4. Badmouthing the other parent — the judge wants to see co-parenting ability, not hostility. Refer to them as "the other parent."
5. Being late — signals you don't take the process seriously. Arrive 30 minutes early.
6. Dressing disrespectfully — showing up in casual clothes tells the judge you don't care.
7. Not bringing required documents — financial statements, parenting plans, prior court orders.
8. Failing to follow court orders — if you have existing orders, follow them to the letter BEFORE your hearing.
9. Bringing kids to court — unless specifically ordered, children should not be in the courtroom.
10. Not completing the co-parenting class — finish "Two Families Now" before your hearing.

• Read the order carefully. Understand every detail: custody schedule, support amount, drop-off times, communication rules.
• Follow the order immediately. Even if you disagree or plan to appeal. Violating damages credibility for future modifications.
• Keep a copy with you at all times. If there's a dispute about parenting time, you need to show the order.
• Document compliance. Track every exchange, payment, and communication in your custody journal.
• Complete any requirements — parenting classes, counseling, drug screens. Do them on time, keep proof.
• If you want to appeal — 30 days to file a notice of appeal with the MA Appeals Court. Talk to an attorney immediately.
• If circumstances change — file a Complaint for Modification (CJD 104) if there's a material and substantial change.

Official court forms (all free at Mass.gov):

• Filing for Child Custody — Step-by-Step Guide
• All Probate & Family Court Forms
• Complaint for Modification (CJD 104)
• Financial Statement Short Form (CJD 301S)
• 2025 Child Support Guidelines + Worksheet (CJD 304)
• Fee Waiver Forms (Affidavit of Indigency)
• Get an Immediate (Emergency) Custody Order
• 209A Abuse Prevention Orders — For Defendants

Self-help & legal aid:

• Court Service Centers — free help filling out forms (9 locations)
• MassLegalHelp.org — free plain-English legal info
• MA Legal Resource Finder — search for free/low-cost help
• MA Free Legal Answers — post a question, get a pro bono answer
• eFileMA — file online
• Find your court

Emergency numbers:

• 911 — Immediate danger
• 988 — Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (call or text)
• 1-833-773-2445 — MA Behavioral Health Help Line (24/7)
• 1-833-912-6878 — MA Trial Court Call Line
• 1-877-785-2020 — SafeLink (MA Statewide DV Hotline, 24/7)